(Not so) boring reality
by Sikari8
Summary: Rick and Morty get stuck in the universe where science from their world doesn't work, and they are faced with their scariest adventure so far: boring, everyday life. Unfortunately for them, during their stay in alternative dimension, they have to face not only common life issues (how the hell does dishwasher work?), but also their own feelings...


"Hello, Rick!" when Morty stepped into their apartment, the first thing he noticed was a quiet humming. He frowned, looking for the source of the unknown sound, when Rick finnaly appeared in the kitchen doorway.

"Hey," he greeted the boy and took off his new glasses. "How was work?"

"Great. I'll get paid tomorrow so we can afford to stock our fridge with something fresh, I am sick of instant noodles and mac'n'cheese. And how were you?"

"Studying." He was tired, his eyes red from the lack of sleep. Morty couldn't help but notice that he didn't wear his usual lab coat, but oversized t shirt he bought few weeks ago. He looked...different. Un - Rick like.

It's been only two months. What the hell happened to us?

"Anyway, where's that weird noise coming from?"

"Washing machine."

"WHAT? Are you seriously…doing household chores?" Rick shrugged.

"Well, someone has to do it." Now, Morty was sure. They both went fucking crazy. But the worst part is...it wasn't exactly unpleasant.

2 MONTHS AGO

„Don't worry M - m -m orty, I have everything under control. Did you hear me? EVERY - EVERY - FUCKING -THING."

But for the first time during his adventures with Rick, Morty was actually scared. Not just scared, but fucking terrified. Because he's never seen such a look on Ricks face. It was apparent that for once in his life, he didn't know what to do.

„So…are we stuck there?"

„Don't insult your grandpa's intelligence Morty, I am fucking genius! Why don't you go sleep or masturbace or whatever you youngsters do these days? Give me few seconds and I'll get us out of there before you'll say Gazorpazorb! „

Morty rolled his eyes.

„Sure, whatever, Rick. I am gonna find something to eat. You do what you gotta do."

With those words Morty backed off from the space cruise. It was in pretty bad shape, but that much was to be expected after crashing into an asteroid. But it was still able to fly somehow, until they entered this planet's atmosphere, just barely managing to land. Once the underframe hit the ground, the entire Cruise went still.

And what was worse, Rick's portal gun didn't work either.

Morty decided to look around the village they landed in. It was quite lonely place, only few houses forming half circle together, with a small square in the middle. After Morty quickly looked around, he notices big colorful sign with words „Fish'n'Chips" written on it. They must have landed in the alternative version of England. It wasn't something he would usually eat, but for now was just glad he found something to soothe his growling stomach with.

Entering the shop, he sighed with the relief at the sight of regular fast food place. Even the guy behind the counter looked like your everyday teenager.

„Hello!" the boy raised eyes from his phone and grinned at Morty.

„Heya" he answered. Morty couldn't help but notice his strong british accent. „what can I get you?"

Morty studied the menu for a few minutes.

In the end, he decided to be stereotypical American and asked for two burgers, because most of the meals on the menu were just… weird. Cheese and pickle sandwich? Just the name was making him nauseous. That was too crazy, even for british people.

„Here, that will be ten pounds"

„C - card please." He „borrowed" Rick's spare credit card several months ago. The scientist didn't seem to notice and well, Morty deserved at least some compensation for all the weird adventures Rick dragged his ass into.

„That's weird," the cashier frowned, „I am sorry, but your card is being declined. I mean, not really declined… it's showing error. Maybe your credit card is damaged?" he tapped at the screen.

Morty thought of the non functioning portal gun. This situation was slowly getting even worse.

"Ouch. I only have dollars,"he said desperately, taking out his wallet. „I – I am sorry, I was sure the credit card will w - w -work…"

„Hey, don't worry about it,"the guy waved his hand dismissively. „just pay me in dollars, I'll exchange it somewhere in the city"

„R- really?'

Well, what can I say… I have weakness for tourists. I am Garry, by the way. Nice to meet you," the boy blinked at him, and Morty felt blush slowly creeping into his cheeks. „O – okay… t – tha…

„MoOOorty! Stop fucking flirting over here, I figured it o - o - oout!"

„Jesus, Rick, how did you find me?! And how much did you drink?" He looked even more wasted than usual.

I – it BURP helps me to focus", he said, dragging Morty out of the shop, leaving the confused cashier behind.

„Jeez, Rick, I didnt even thank him properly!"

„Well, that's too bad. For him I mean. I guess your credit card didn't work heh? „ Rick took a big bite of the burger that he managed to snatch from Morty's hands.

„Y – you know about t – t – that?"

„Of course Morty, I am not THAT stupid, I just don't care. It was connected to some Switzerland account anyway." Morty wasn't even surprised. They kept dancing around each other this way since Rick came back into their lives - Morty always trying to outsmart the older guy, finding out in the end that he was just toyed with.

"So, what did you want to tell me?"

"I finally GOT it MOOOoorty! It's the SCIENCE! Science doesn't work here!"

"What the fuck Rick? How much did you fucking drink? You don't make any sense!"

"Well, it works, technically. But not in the same way as in our universe. Do you get it Morty? It's the same earth, but the science field works on completely different terms! Our technology doesn't work here, and never will!" Rick seemed...excited?

"Well...so what now?" the smile from the older man's lips disappeared, finally realizing what he just said.

Well, Morty… I have no fucking idea."


End file.
